Day 1377 – So Much To Worry About – And Me?

Monday, October 28, 2024

So much to worry about, and me, what am I worried about?

Well, frankly nothing, other than Donald Trump becoming President and our country turned into an authoritarian state, and where would we move? And how are all those Trump voter going to live once he takes away or bankrupts Social Security and what about Gaza? And how can you have a two state solution when neither side wants it? And how do Jewish people rationalize shooting out the water tanks in Gaza, stealing Palestinian land in the West Bank, and practicing the worst case of apartheid on the planet? And Ukraine, now there are North Korean troops there, WTF?

But other than that what keeps me up at night is holes. Well, not the holes themselves but what is at the bottom of the holes. Yup. I should know better. I should quit, but how can I? Because I don’t know the answer. And when I do, who will care? It’s tough, some say, getting old. I don’t know. I’m not old yet. So when I get there I’ll let you know.

We have a drainage line from a downspout that runs under the lawn and goes to the back forty. It runs under the fence to get there. I remember seeing the outlet years ago. It’s over there – somewhere. Now, it’s disappeared. The water now appears about halfway down the lawn in a giant wet soggy patch when it rains hard. It hasn’t been too bad in recent years. That’s because the gutter runs the wrong way and has been spilling onto the deck rather than going down the downspout. 

But we got the downspout and gutter replaced and now, if it rains, the water should go down the spout. Part of the deal with the gutter guys was they were going to snake a power washer down the line and clean it out. That didn’t happen. The fellas stomped around the back, kicked some leaves, felt for a soft spot and gave up. We ran water down the drainage pipe, located the wet area and I dug through the lawn and found the black pipe. It was clogged solid with sand. Apparently, you can’t power wash your way through thirty or so feet of sand in a pipe.

Having been unsuccessful in locating the end of the pipe I decided to see if I could find the pipe a few feet farther down from the hole I had just dug. For the last week every afternoon I have asked myself this question as I have footed (not inched) closer and closer to the backyard fence. I had considered getting a curve bladed edging type tool so I could rock it back and forth on either side of the pipe. My son who has worked at many a golf course and fixed many a drainpipe said, “No Dad, Use a square ended shovel.” He sent me pictures of a drainpipe he and his team had to replace. Nice square patches of sod moved to one side so they could be put back in place. Long narrow perfectly cut trenches. Pea graveled and oh so nice. 

This did not in anyway resemble my work. Of course it didn’t help that the pipe wasn’t laid straight but instead wandered off course two feet from the downspout. In fact, as I dug more holes I wondered if the team who laid it had been drinking. It also would help if what I had was a sod lawn, but I don’t. Especially in the area the drain pipe was headed, mainly the root infested dry earth near the corner of the fence and the tree house/jungle gym. This called for the sawsall, which cut through some of those roots and on others jumped over them. The sawsall has a behavior of giving up on occasion. It spits out its blade and basically says, “Nope, not gonna do it.”

However, I got enough holes done the day before yesterday to have cleared the root rise and saw I was heading toward the treehouse. I was almost to the fence. I had taken to soaking the area the day before to soften the ground. Yesterday, I located the pipe just shy of the treehouse and less than four feet from the fence. Exciting? You bet.

I decided to try the other side of the fence and am happy to report that I located it there too. By then it was getting gloomy and subsequent holes yielded nothing, or if they did it was too dark to tell. Mystery son had said he used to use a golf shaft to stab the ground to locate the drainage pipe. I used a giant crowbar and or a pitchfork with four tines. However, in a root infest hellscape it’s hard to determine what you are hitting.

Not only that but if you had used dead reckoning, that is by standing in the back forty and lining up with the downspout and eyeballing where a direct drainage line should go, you’d be off by fifteen or so feet. Yeah, these guy who dug the ditch must have been an anti-Nascar driver. He wander off to the right. If he had gone straight he would have left the jungle gym/tree house off  to his right a good six feet. Instead the pipe went toward the far edge and almost to the corer of the fence. 

I had been asked, “Why didn’t they go all the way to the creek like your neighbors opposite your back yard on the next street over?”

Well, I figured that out. Drain pipe comes in 50 and 100 foot lengths. They bought fifty and quit where it ran out, which given the direction that pipe is headed is a good thing because it’s probably just shy of my neighbor’s woods.

The last little bit of pipe resides somewhere near a clump of roots and trees. It was too dark to locate last night. Stay tuned.

The adventure continues.