Day 968 Nuke the Cane!
Stand with Trump on stopping Hurricanes
Saturday August 31, 2019
431 Days until the 2020 election and 513 days until the Inauguration
“Mr. president, we have triangulated coordinates that would be best to explode a thermo-nuclear device in the advancement of Hurricane Dorian.”
“Fantastic. What are you waiting for?”
“You have to give the word, sir.”
“Do it.”
“Yes sir.”
“Where exactly are you going to explode it?”
“We have the coordinates here sir.”
“Is it out in the ocean?”
“No sir, it’s on land. Palm Beach, sir. 1100 South Ocean Boulevard.”
“That sound familiar.”
“Yes sir. It should.”
“Why?”
It’s the address of the old Merriweather Post estate, sir.”
“Mar-a-Lago?”
“Yes sir.”
“I own that!”
“Yes you do sir.”
“Will it be hurt?”
“No sir. It will be utterly destroyed. There won’t be any sign it was ever there.”
“Is that all?”
“No sir. The detonation will do nothing to stop the hurricane, which will continue it’s advancement, but now it will be loaded with radioactivity, which it will spread up the coast of Florida into Georgia and South Carolina.”
“Is that bad?”
“It will make that area unlivable for 10,000 years sir.”
“Maybe we shouldn’t do it.”
“Yes, sir. We’ll hold off, sir.”
“Excuse me Mr. president, Have you seen the news today?”
“No.”
“Oh boy*”
(* Sorry John.)
“What?”
“Remember you’re telling the reporters about those phone calls you got from China?”
“No. Yes. What about it?”
“Well, China says it never happened.”
“Bad connection.”
“And then the press core said you didn’t attend a meeting on climate change.”
“I remember. I said it hadn’t happened yet.”
“But it had, and your press team said you missed the meeting because you were in talks with India and Germany.”
“Bi-lateral talks. Isn’t that what you call it?”
“Yes sir. Only problem is that the meeting on climate change that was being held at the same time your press team told the press corp that you were in meetings with Germany and India shows your chair empty and the heads of those two countries in the meeting on climate change.”
“So?”
“So if you’re going to lie, or your press team is going to lie for you, it is suggested that you don’t lie in such a way that you can be caught in the lie with a single photo. Sir.”
“Is that all?”
“No sir. The impeachment proceedings.”
“No Collusion!”
“Yes sir. It has been revealed that you committed more impeachable offenses in the past week than the three presidents before you who faced impeachment proceeding committed combined.”
“Is that a record?”
“Yes sir, and apparently they might just stop writing down all your offenses and go with what they’ve got.”
“So?”
“So your strategy of committing more crimes out in the open every week then they can invesitage is falling apart.”
“That wasn’t a strategy.”
“Oh.”
“There was no collusion.”
“Yes. sir.”
431 Days until the 2020 election and 513 days until the Inauguration
PS Don’t Tread on Me! (You’ll stub your toe.)
