Archives for July 2023

Friday, July 14, 2023

Well, Joe Biden was in Helsinki where he reaffirmed America’s support for NATO, and he made it clear we were supporting Ukraine for however long it takes. Compare that to five years ago. Trump was there and talking about breaking up NATO if other countries didn’t pay up, as if they were delinquent renters. Trump also sided with Putin at that time over our own intelligence services, and he held secret talks with Putin, the topics of which we’ve never been privy to. 

Let’s quickly review Trump’s foreign policies and their achievements. 

He gave away norther Syria to Russia, Assad , and Turkey. This allowed the Turks to come in and slaughter the men, women, and children who had fought and defeated the Caliphate. Those people were our friends and allies.

He pulled out of the Iran nuclear deal. Iran is now close to having a bomb.

He made buddy buddy with Kim Jong Un. North Korea just fired a new long range missile.

He threatened the very existence of NATO, weakening it. This allowed Putin to think he could get away with invading Ukraine and the west and NATO would do nothing.

Since Biden has been President, NATO is more unified that ever before. Two neutral countries have now joined as well as many from the Warsaw Pact (For those saying, “Well, Russia owns them so what’s the big deal?” You have to ask, “If that is true why did those countries join a pact against said owners?”)

So five years ago our President was siding with people set on destroying our way of life and giving away the store. Now that has stopped and we are stronger against the threats to us and our way of life. How’s that for a brief summary? (What about Hunter’s laptop? You say? I ask, “When will you ever learn?” Hey there’s a song lyric in there!)

Now onto the Mar-a-Lago documents case. Jack Smith filed a reply brief to the Trump lawyers. His was ten pages compared to their twelve. Fortunately, he reminded those lawyers of the law and The Constitution because they seemed to have forgotten a few key points. Lord knows what Judge Cannon knows so it is probably helpful for her too.

The defense can ask for a delay, but it is the judge’s job by law to set a trial date. It is not the prosecuting team that demands a quick and speedy trial but the Constitution and the public (“We the People”) are entitled to such a trial. Something the Trumpian folks seemed not to know.

As to the voluminous documents and the “We haven’t seen anything yet” argument – Yeah, well the Smith team has bent over backwards to give them evidence way before they had to. Not only that, they gave them a roadmap of key documents and reasons. Oh, and I love this – they turned over all the grand jury testimony. I wonder how that went over when Trump had that read to him (I assume he had it read to him because he can’t read, or at least not much beyond a few bullet points) because the sycophants around him (“Oh you won the election, sir. No doubt. Election machines switched votes for sure. And what about Hunter’s laptop?”) probably sang a much different tune when faced with jail time if they lied. (It probably went more like: “Well, we thought the machines switched votes, but we couldn’t find any evidence of that.” and “Well, we thought that big black box had fraudulent votes from China, but there was no bamboo in the paper.” and “He lost. Everyone knew that.”)

Oh and as to the 800,000 pages of stuff? Yeah. well a lot of it is header and footer email things and there are only 4,500 pages of real info. Not big in a judicial proceeding.

Here is the part I like best;

“The Defendants are, of course, free to make whatever arguments they like for dismissal of the indictment, and the Government will respond promptly,”… “But they should not be permitted to gesture at a baseless legal argument, call it ‘novel’ and then claim the court will require an indefinite continuance in order to resolve it.”

Meanwhile, Jared has testified to the Special Counsel. What many believe Jack Smith wanted was to hear that Trump was considering seizing voting machines and declaring Marshall Law. This would be evidence that Trump knew he had lost. Why is that important? It turns out that if you truly believe something that is BS then you aren’t guilty of acting criminally if you act based on it. (Similar, to telling someone something that isn’t true but you believed it to be true. “Trust me. The Earth is flat.”)

And there’s apparently a woman who heard Trump say, “I can’t believe I lost to that f*ing guy.” (Ya Gotta Believe! Sorry, where was I?) and then he proceeded to delude himself that the election was stolen. (You know what I’d like to see happen? I’d like Ivanka say to him, “Dad, You’re a loser.”)

Thursday, July 13, 2023

Okay, before we get going let me tell you about “Ain’t Too Proud,” a musical revival that is the story of The Temptations. We saw it Tuesday night and it is terrific. Not only was the music great but so was their story and the way it was told. I have never seen an audience so happy and smiling. We were all talking to one another after the show. There is one original Temptation left and he is responsible for the show. BTW There have been 27 Temptations over the years and the group is still together.

Okay, now on to miscellaneous stuff. The Trump team of lawyers have filed a motion in the Mar-a-Lago documents case asking that the trial be delayed forever or a long long time – I forget which. It’s a twelve page filing and one commentator recommended reading it because 1) it is well written, and 2) it lays out all the reasons for delaying, I’m no lawyer but I am going to go through the reasons and my rebuttal to those reasons, Then we’ll move on to “Hunter Biden’s Laptop” or the New McCarthyism of the Freedom Caucus and their embarrassing displays of arrogance and lying.

But first – The Trump Team reason for delay #1 – There’s a lot of paper to read.

Rebuttal #1 – Your client doesn’t read. Next.

The Trump Team reason for delay #2 – He’s under investigation and indictment elsewhere.

Rebuttal #2 – So?

The Trump Team reason for delay #3 – He’s a busy man. He’s running for President.

Rebuttal #3 – So?

Okay, that wraps up their arguments.

It turns out that the besides the judge being very new to the bench, and having little experience in any cases let alone something like this, and the last time around bent over backwards to aid Trump and having both her rulings overturned, is also going to schedule the trial in a very Trump friendly area of Florida; but she is the one who will impose sentencing and she can give him no jail time.

The Justice Department has done the very unusual step of protesting (I forget the legal term) the sentencing of the head of the Oathkeepers, Stuart Rose. They say the 18 year sentence isn’t enough. I hope all our law and order Republican politicians get behind this.

Now on to Jim Jordan, Matt Gaetz, and Robert Kennedy, Jr. and their latest embarrassing hearing. The highlight was Matt Gaetz reading of a bunch of claims made in a document about something or other. I think it was about FBI Director Wray or some of the investigations being conducted and olde Matty boy had proof right there in this here document that proved Wray was biased against Trump! Powerful stuff.

Gaetz went on to badger Wray to conclude that something Gaetz had read was indeed proof of interferencene by the FBI, or some such thing.

Okay, I, and others, have a few questions:

1. How was the document that Gaetz read purported to be written in 2017 contain photos from 2022?

2. How was it that the What’s App messages displayed in the document were the wrong color and bubble format for the App at the time alleged?

3. How was it that Hunter Biden’s lawyer could prove that every item in the document read was untrue?

Additionally, does Mr. Gaetz not understand that if an FBI Director was to draw conclusions about an ongoing investigation as Mr. Gaetz wanted him to do that it would be interference, the very thing Gaetz wanted to prove?

Then there’s Hunter Biden laptop – a phrase so oft repeated by the Republicans you got to wonder. We’ve been here before. Last time it was Hillary’s emails. h, and Benghazi. In this case Hunter had a laptop that he brought in for repair and the person supposedly copied the contents and there was supposedly stuff that mentioned Joe. Wow. A son talks about his father? But it goes deeper than that. Some companies trying to clean up their image hired Hunter and paid him money. Obviously, those companies were hoping that Hunter would get close to the then Vice-President and later the President. (This by the way is an oft used tactic, maybe we should dredge up all the Republican family member who have received money from such things. Sorry, the list is too long to post here.)

There’s one little problem. There’s no evidence that any of that happened or that Joe Biden knew about it. And even if he did know his son was being hired – so what?

(Should I recite the things that are on the Republican side? Well yeah, why not. But first, let me ask, “What position did Hunter Biden have in the Obama or his father’s presidency? You know like Jared had under Donald? Or Ivanka had under dad? Did they forget about her getting deals with China to sell her crappy jewelry and clothing there? Answer – Hunter Biden had no role in either administration.)

Then there’s news that Clarence Thomas had an assistant who received payments from billionaires via Venmo. What’s that about? Clarence and the court are silent. Is it any wonder that the approval rating for the Supreme Court is at an all time low?

Then there’s climate change. In a new book out the author tells the story of a scientist who warned of what was going to happen back in the 70s or 80s. The politicians asked, “How soon?” Answer “40 years.” Reply, “Get back to us in 39.” Time is up.

The author also mentioned that long ago politicians and people used to get together to solve problems. We no longer do that.

I remember when you could go to school, get some grants and loans, work a minimum wage job and come out with a degree and be free of debt. Now? Now, I see postings of “If you can’t pay your loan you should not have taken it?” These posters seem to forget that the Republicans in Congress have destroyed the grant programs and come up with a usury student loan program to help them pay for the cuts they gave to the super rich. The people who post the “Can’t pay your loan” memes seem to forget that they benefitted from programs like The GI Bill and numerous programs that allowed colleges to keep tuition reasonable. But then again I have to wonder what are these institutions doing that are sitting on huge endowments?

In other not-startling-news Republican law makers who voted against programs that would fund programs and get money into their districts are more than happy to go home and boast about all the money that will be flowing into their districts while not mentioning they voted against those very bills.

Speaking of which, a new study says 73% of people in the U.S. want legalized abortion. Yet, Republican legislatures are passing abortion bills. Does this make sense?

Finally, Joe Biden has pulled off another staggering victory. He has got Sweden into NATO. This on the five year anniversary of Trump siding with Putin in Helsinki against our security folks. You know what? I still want to know what he and Putin discussed on their meeting, Hunter’s laptop be damned.

And the economy continues to improve. Inflation is down, jobs are up, and yet I hear the Republican in Congress bitching about it. Yet, they fail to mention any tangible item. Why is that? I’ll tell you why, if they did they’d get creamed with facts and reality.

And then there’s Joe Epps. Joe went to the Capital on January 6th. He was outside, never went in. When things started to turn violent he tried to calm folks down. He has been targeted by Tucker Carlson and Fox for being an FBI agent, which he is not. Fox never let up. Epps had to go into hiding with his wife due to the harassment. He even sold his place. Now he’s suing. Good.

Okay, I’m done.

No I’m not. The Marine Corps is without a leader for the first time in 100 years. Tommy Tuberville is holding up all military promotions and putting our military readiness at risk. It amazes me that he was smart enough to run a football program.

Have a nice day! (Smiley Face)

Sunday July, 9, 2023

The above title to flip the Beatles famous line.

There’s lots to talk about, but before I do let me just say the news headlines I got made me stop and say to myself, “This is news?”

The ultimate news article was a headline about Britney Spears. She’s been involved in an incident with a security guard, an NBA player and a slap. I’m not sure of the details, but I think it is alleged that the security guard slapped her. The security guard was part of the NBA player’s security detail. They’ve been milking this story for several days with tantalizing headlines. But Britney doesn’t blame the player, whose name sounds like a British 90s rock band – Wambarama, or something like that. Well, now the story has reached its apex – I think. Poor Britney lashed out – Do you hear me!? Yeah, she said she’s never been treated equally in this country and fuck you all. Yeah. Big news.

And then, in the last paragraph they mention that the police investigating the incident have reviewed video footage. It appears that Britney hit herself in the face. Yeah. See, there was some pushing and shoving and Britney’s hand hit Britney’s face. Strange but true.

This reminds me of Mad Magazine’s take off on the Daily News, which they called The Daily Dirt. There was a picture of a starlet showing a bruise on her thigh. She was pulling her dress way up so you could see it. The story said this happened when the apartment was being robbed. Wow. The last sentence mentioned that said starlet fell in the bathtub where she received her bruise and at the same time an apartment in the same complex was being robbed.

But this is news today. That an the endless headlines of people being slaughtered, mainly with guns but a few with knives. Turns out there are maniacs in the world and they are running around killing people. We’ve just given them better weapons. 

Is there any news of real interest? Hum. There are the same themes:

Will Trump go to jail?

Why isn’t Biden getting higher approval ratings?

What about the world economy and climate change?

Ukraine?

Inflation?

No. There’s nothing of note.

Carry on.

I can say that comparing the ads on British TV to American there is a difference.

We are asked to save the animals and they ask to save the women in Africa.

It’s the same pitch. And it’s the same pitch to save the elephants and the kids with deformed upper lips, and childhood cancer patients.

“Won’t you help? Your donation of 63 cents a day means X amount can be saved. Every day counts.”

And if you act in the next ten minutes we’ll send you a crappy tote bag, stupid t-shirt, or ugly blanket.

Future news headline:

 – Thelma Biggs of Gary Indiana did not respond to the donate plea within the ten minute window and got nothing! Said Biggs, “I didn’t want the stoopid tote bag. I’ve got a closet full of them. In fact, I waited eleven minutes just to make sure I didn’t get one. They can go fuck themselves.” (Okay, I made that up.)

Okay. Now on to politics. Here’s a prediction: Trump wins the Republican nomination and the presidency. His running mate is Ron DeSantis. Trump gets thrown in jail, but before he does he cuts Justice and the FBI to the bone. DeSantis runs the country into the ground with the help of the Republicans and the Supreme Court. The economy goes to hell and they blame Biden and Hunter. A new scourge sweeps through the nation and then the world as the kookie doctor that DeSantis put in charge of Florida’s health is now in charge of national health and he is advocating cures advocated by Robert Kennedy Junior.

Josh Hawley and Lauren Boebert are gunned down by MJT who brought her big ass gun she used in her campaign ads to the House floor to show off as there are now no magnetometers in place. The gun accidentally went off as she pointed it at Boebert calling her a little bitch. Hawley got shot in the ass as he was running away from the assault as Green swung the gun around and said, “Where are you going you little bitch?” Whoops. A two second clip released 75 bullets from the motion of swinging the gun. “It was an accident said Taylor-Green, but she’s still a little bitch. So’s he.”

Trump meanwhile issued a blanket pardon for everybody and the jail cells were emptied out. No discernible uptick in violence was noted. 

Trump was on his way to meet Putin to give away Ukraine and western Europe when he was thrown in jail for littering.

Saturday, July 1, 2023

We got home. More on that later in this screed, but two, maybe three things.

One: I am, once again learning more legal and Constitutional sh*t than I ever cared to learn, due to the recent Supreme Court decisions and the Mothers for Liberty.

I also read a piece about this woman who has tirelessly worked to overturn Roe and ban all abortions because she saw the phony movie “Silent Scream” years ago.

The right, I am told, is worried about “grooming.” This seems to mean that children are being manipulated to believe certain things and then act in ways these folks don’t like. Their two big concerns seem to be that children will become queer and boys will pretend to be girls so they can sneak into the girls’ bathroom. (What ever happened to the old peep hole?)

Ya know, the people who seem most concerned about these things seem to project the vertical y behaviors they say they want to prevent.

I too am worried about grooming of our young people. Take for instance the graphic comic approach to selling the Junior AR15. First you need to know there is such a weapon. What’s it for? It’s for kids. Yeah, it’s a weapon of mass murder made for and marketed to kids. They market it via graphic novel layout. They show young people defending property with the JAR15. They show a boy dressed in t-shirt, baseball cap turned backwards and cargo pants with their weapon slung across his body defending property. Does it work? You betcha. Just look at what Kyle Rittenhouse was wearing the night he killed someone trying to stop him from killing someone.

The Mothers of Liberty is the latest way the right is trying to push their pseudo-Christian white supremacist ideas on us and destroy our country. This involves mainly suburban Republican women dressed up in red, white, and blue  trying to take over school boards and local government posts so they can divert money from pubic schools and put it in religious segregated schools. Talk about grooming! And, oh yeah, destroying public education.

Then we get to the Supreme Court. Let’s start with the last item first. Clarence Thomas says he didn’t know he had to report trips with friends on his financial forms. He’s going to amend those forms. Great. Case closed. Nothing to see here. I mean doesn’t everyone get all paid for vacations on yachts and stuff? As Shawn Hannity would say, “Honest mistake.”

And Thomas got into it with the other black person on the bench. Speculation is he doesn’t like not being the only black person on the court. However, I disagree. I don’t think he likes the law being explained to him by someone who is way smarter than him.

It is stunning the sh*t this court is trying to pull off. I’m no lawyer, but even I can see how outrageous it is. Last night I learned that in order to bring a suit someone has to be hurt (ie damaged), and I learned that a court does not rule on hypotheticals. That is until now. 

In one case a woman wanted to know if she expanded her business to wedding websites would she have to design a website for a gay couple? Okay, she’s not in the business as of now, but she might be someday (hypothetical) and she hasn’t been asked nor does she have a gay couple wanting her services (double hypothetical). But the court took the case and said, “No, you don’t have to do it.”

Next thing ya know, some guy who owns a restaurant is going to ask if he has to serve people he doesn’t like, or believes they are devils, or something. Maybe maybe, they are black? Maybe, he doesn’t like black people? Maybe, his religion says black people are devils so for religious reasons … This isn’t a slippery slope this is a greased track, a double black diamond.

Then there was the case that several states brought including Missouri (I think it was Missouri, maybe Arkansas) and it was about abortion or god – I forget. However, the state was arguing for a company, Amy what’s her name the last loon appointed to the bench asked, “Why isn’t the company here making the case?” The answer was simple. They didn’t want to be involved. As in, they wanted nothing to do with the case, but the state lawyer said that they, the state, could represent them. Wait. The company didn’t want to be involved, oh, and said they weren’t harmed. So what have we got? No harm. A hypothetical and the court listens? WTF?

This is what it’s come to. The highest court in the land is ruling on hypotheticals and listening to cases where the people being represented want nothing to do with it, and aren’t harmed.

And we have justices that don’t seem to know that they can’t take all expense paid trips from “friends” without reporting it. (Kind of reminds me of Ron White when he said if he got rich he’d be with “his new friends” in Palm Beach.)

Okay, back to the exciting “Adventures in Newark!”

Let me make it clear, we could have gotten out Day One on a train. However, Amtrak charges a lot if you book day of – like $360 for what would have been a $32 ticket two months before.

I could have waited on the phone ninety minutes or more to get United to do something or we could have waited in line at the customer service counter. You know it’s bad when you look at the evening news and they show the very ticket counter you opted not to wait in-line to talk to a rep. Shelby met one couple that did wait – 3 hours, moved ten feet.

Okay, so, picture this. We are in one of four hotels surrounded by high speed highways. It’s a giant oval. The only restaurant you can walk to is The  Café at The Courtyard. Otherwise it’s what you hoarded from breakfast or bought at the little store in the hotel.

I called one place, asked if they delivered, “Yes,” but not there and they hung up. I went to the front desk and they shared three menus of places that did deliver: Chinese, deli/pizza, and Thai.

We got subs day one and Chinese later that evening. The next day we did the super interesting wet/carby breakfast bar and hoarded gorp. I had bought a bottle of white wine to go with the Chinese the night before, so I had that and some left over red. I had gone to the Courtyard (a happening place, btw. They had a bar with people at it!!!)

I bought two tiny Ben and Jerry’s cups and two pints – thirty bucks. One pint. was a Twixt Chocolate cookie thing and the other was some yogurt like ice cream or maybe it was soy – who knows?

At 2pm we had to leave our room. That was as late a check out they would allow. We’re sitting in the lobby. I finished the red in the room and the Twixt. So I’ve got the gorp, white wine and the soy/ice cream/ yogurt thing in a bag. Our flight is at 8:20pm. We decide to hang out in the lobby. The DING bell isn’t going off much because it’s kind of low volume at the front desk and market in mid afternoon.

I’m reading a book about the decipherment of Egyptian Hieroglyphs. I call United, answer the robot questions and am referred to an associate, I am informed the wait will be 90 minutes. At least they didn’t have a loop of ads with things like “Did you know? … Thanks for flying United.” Instead they played very bland quiet music on hold. I left one ear bud in and read 60 or 70 pages before someone came on line about one hour and 45 minutes after being on hold. 

We had gotten our flights with our miles. We got our new flight with more miles. However, the new flight had cost significantly more in miles, because it was booked at the last minute. Well, the quiet man on the other end of the line said we’d have to take that up with the redemption unit or whatever he called it. And like so many people who were kind enough to give us advice which always started with, “Just tell them …” To which I responded “After ninety minutes …”

He put me on hold for twenty minutes while he got our refund started on our original leg.

“What about paying for the hotel? etc.”

I don’t know. didn’t ask. Didn’t come up. My experience with North West years ago was that under “amenities” they mention that only First Class and International travelers get accommodations.

I had never thought to look under amenities for getting screwed.

So maybe there’s a chance we’ll get some compensation. Just call and tell them …

Oh and so I was in the lobby, waiting for the shuttle to take us to the airport. What to do with the pint of unopened soy/ice cream whatever. Well, I wasn’t going to drink the warm slushy mess. I walked to “the Market” DONG! opened the freezer door and put it in there next to the frozen pasta. I noted the upper shelf was now full of little Ben and Jerry’s cups. Nice.

As I went by the front desk I mentioned that to the women that they now had ice cream. They tittered. I wondered what would happen when someone tried to buy that pint of soy whatever?

“I’m sorry. We don’t shoe that in our computer. Let me call someone. … Yeah. I don’t know. We don’t have it on our screen. It says … sir, can you show me that again? Cookie dough Soy … Yeah, I think the Courtyard sells it. It doesn’t scan here. I don’t know.”

Will the person in front of the desk get my soy stuff or will they not?

A question I will never know the answer to.

Maybe, I should call the Fairfield and ask? “hey I left a pint of soy ice cream in the freezer. Would you mind sending it to me?”

The story should end here but it doesn’t. We got to the airport about 5:30. Our flight is at 8:20. It’s delayed until 9:20.

The flight in front of us was delayed so our flight delayed leaving, waiting for the gate to clear.

Then we were delayed until 10:20. Then they announced a gate change. It was in the other arm of the terminal. I was tired. My back hurt. Oh and when we checked our bags for the flight I was over weight. So here I am pulling out socks and underwear, much to the chagrin of Shelby, to get down four pounds. the pisser was, I had checked my weight with my never fail weigh scale. I had already pulled out books and stuff so my carry on and my backpack were already heavy. This guy comes out from security and stops right in the stream of traffic and looks up. There’s nothing to look up to at that point. It’s like the people who take the down escalator, which is packed and stop when they get off, then get angry when they get pushed. I plowed into the guy. Too tired to go around. I don’t know if he minded or even felt it. He was pretty oblivious and I was moving so who knows?

I mumbled, “Sorry” to no one in particular.

We got off the ground at 12:01am and landed in Richmond a little after one o’clock in the morning. I was trying to get an Uber while waiting for our bags. Weird responses. “We can’t pick you up there” What? Blackish screen. I kept trying. Nothing. By nothing I mean I couldn’t find any part of my phone’s screen that would respond to being poked or prodded. While I was doing this Shelby was looking for our bags. The luggage conveyor had stopped there were six army duffel bags on the track and that was it.

Was it going to start up again?  A guy with the yellow kneepads on said no that was it. I continued to poke at the Uber app. All of a sudden there was Shelby’s with our bags. “They were in this room. Must have come on the earlier flight. I had to crawl over a bunch of bags to get them.” An older couple was standing at the doorway of the luggage room wondering if they should go in. “Do you see your bags?” “Yes, They are over there.” “Well, hat are you waiting for?”

We went out to the street and joined the gang waiting for Ubers. Ta-dah the app now worked. We got home after 2am. Hauled the bags into the garage and up to the entry way and left them there. I showered. We slept like the dead.

Friday, June 30, 2023

To bring you up to last night – We were on our way to Heathrow Airport, London when our United app informed us our trip had been cancelled because one leg of the trip had the flight cancelled. It turned out to be the last leg.The one hour and four minute flight from Newark, New Jersey to Richmond, Virginia.

Hey? Can’t we take the London to Newark flight? Why sure, but you can’t do that via the app or the check-in kiosk. You have to stand in line behind a bunch of people to talk to the one United employee working the desk. Then a second person showed up and we were on our way to Newark. Ta-Dah!

Shelby got us a room for the cheapest price possible – two hundred dollars. What a deal!

We were in an oval of super highways. Four hotels in a row. Only one restaurant – the Café at the Court Yard. The Courtyard is Marriott’s signature brand. We were in the Fairfield. The Marriott’s not signature brand. The difference is The Courtyard has a bar and a café. The Courtyard charges you for breakfast. The Fairfield includes it: two warmer round hot hinged devices holding four pre-made, recently reheated “products,” cold cereal, hot oatmeal, fruit (not ripe), eight condiments( sunflower seeds, granola, raisins, sliced almonds, etc.) coffee (all day! all night!)* etc.

*The cups said, “Starbucks” and it was between “okay” and “good,” which just goes to show that if you don’t let the baristas at Starbucks brew the swill it can actually be made to taste okay as opposed to burnt, acidic, and over-caffeinated. Amazing.

The round hot service had egg product, which was some sort of watery premade scrambled egg. This is a staple of “the breakfast included” menu at any hotel. It typically shares the burner with either sausage, vegan sausage, bacon, or Canadian bacon. Ours had vegan sausage beside the scrambled product. God knows what that is made of. 

The other burner was divided between real sausage with watery grease and on the first day a cheesy egg croissant. The croissant part was soggy from the wet warm environment it was served in. They were dumped into the serving half side and some didn’t quite make it and were slightly crushed when the lid came down. Others had their contents slipping out. Some had both! Crushed and slipping out – take your pick. Yum. I went for the watery egg product with muffin. Yes, they had muffins.

The second day the croissant was replaced with a ham, egg, and cheese sandwich. Their take on a egg McMuffin. I took the last one and told the ladies in the back who brought out “the product” and coffee. They were rapidly talking in Spanish. They laughed when my presence interrupted them. One woman whom I knew by sight and nod said, “Okay (senor?)”  as she laughingly passed me and sort of put her hand up to my arm like an old friend would do when they found something very funny. A few moments later I went back to that doorway with the sandwich still on the plate. The one lady whom I had spoken to looked at me questionably. 

“This sandwich.”

“Si? No good?”

“No. It’s actually good.”

She laughed with a kind of “whew” gesture. Like it must be some mistake. You actually had something that tasted good. I mean it still had the soggy half crushed, contents falling out display but it tasted decent.

Not something one expects at the free breakfast bar.

Shelby had the great idea to take a coffee cup and put a collection of the condiments and make some gorp. A combination of the sugary granola, sunflower seeds, raisins, and sliced almonds. I did it too. We used a lid to hold it in while we shook it to mix it up. Great. Snackage.

Due to storms across the country, lots of flights had been cancelled. Originally, we got through Customs before most people because we have “Global Entry.” That means we are pre-registered and put our right hand on a finger print pad and take a head shot picture and were through. While I waited for bags Shelby went ahead to see about booking our final leg home.

When I came out from Baggage Claim, Shelby was near the end of a snaking cordoned line to a United counter. she had come out, seen the line, went upstairs to find another United counter only to discover the actual United ticket counter was in a different terminal. Screw it: get a cab, go to the hotel, figure it out later.

The hotel is in an oval circle of high speed highways. It’s one of four. My only question was, “Do they have a bar?” Answer, “No,” but they have a basket next to the the place where you check in that holds four bottles of wine. (“Better snag one of those bad-boys before they run out.”) I later learned they had white wine in the refrigerator in their “Market.” That’s the place that went “Dong!” every time someone went into the space.

The United app could book us a new flight at higher prices or we could use more miles, at higher mileage rates than the canceled leg. Amtrak would sell us tickets for $360. The same ticket you could buy a month in advance for $32. Nice. Same for other modes of transportation. Rental cars – sold out. I called United, answered the robots questions, listened to the instructions of using the app or website, declined all that and was told a representative would be with me shortly before I got the “We are experiencing higher than normal wait time” message. Do these airlines employ statisticians? Because if they do I’d like to know at what time do they not experience “higher than normal” wait times? Maybe, I should write a letter and ask.

To whom it may concern,

Every time I connect to your staff they are experiencing “higher than normal” wait times. Is this always the case? ie that you always are experiencing “higher than normal” wait times? If so, than I’d like to point out that your “higher than normal” wait times are your normal wait times.

Thank-you,

A concerned customer.

This might be better than:

Listen you idiots, I know what you’re doing! Do you think I’m stupid? You’re the idiots. We already established that in my first sentence.

The “experiencing higher than normal wait times” message was followed by “your wait time is over 90 minutes” and the “you can use our app” or “go to our website” messages.

Ninety minutes! We’ll try later.

To Be continued …