Monday, February 19, 2024
Shelby went out for most of the day, which left me alone with my thoughts, a dangerous thing to be sure.
By 10 a.m. the part for the dishwasher had arrived from Amazon. It’s a little piece of rope with plastic ends. It anchors the spring that allows the door to open assisted, without dropping like a ton of deadweight. All you have to do is pull the machine out, take off the side panel, remove the old part which is now in two pieces because the rope wore out, and put the machine back together and slide it back in place.
Estimated time – all day.
The fix – if you know what you are doing – takes 30 seconds. The problem is there’s no drawing or photo showing you how it’s supposed to look. The last time I did this repair I took the door apart, only to realize that the hinge attaches to the door, but did not pivot or get restrained via the door.
Then you have to pull the dishwasher out from under the cabinet, but you can’t because the water line and the electric wires are too short. Of course you don’t realize you have to pull the dishwasher all the way out to take off the side panel until you’ve got the door in pieces (the first time. This time I skipped that step) and the screws are out from the front of the side panel. “Huh, there must be screws in the back end of the dishwasher.”
So now you had better have cut the electricity. And to get to the water cut off, which is under the sink ,you have to remove all the cans and bottles on that half of the under sink cabinet. You can’t quite get in to unscrew the water hose because the cabinet has two doors and a big piece of honking wood running down the middle of the cabinet, which means your shoulders don’t quite fit.
Eventually, you get the hose detached and realize that the hose is held back by the hole in the wood side panel and you’ll have to detach the other end too. At some point you also realize that the electric wires are too short and they have to come off too. All this requires lying on your side on the floor with little clearance to swing a wrench for the hose fitting.
Finally, the dishwasher comes out. You can remove the back four screws, remove the side panel, and take out one half of the broken part. The part that when the rope broke got flung by the spring into the bowels of the dishwasher where it’s been half blocking your attempts to close the door when trying to run the machine until you realize that the door hinge is broken. The other half is still on the right angle extention on the door. That’s good news because you now know where the part is anchored. However, something doesn’t look right. How are you going to attach the other end to the long spring?
Fortunately, the kid took a picture of the assembled spring when the other side broke awhile back. All I need to do is search 8,771 photos to find it. This is harder than you imagine because with that many photos it’s easy to miss the one you are looking for. I had recently learned about “tagging” a photo and promised myself to mark the photo once I found it. After some 45 minutes I found it. First thing I was going to do was tag it. This requires you know how to tag a photo. I suggest Apple do something clever like make a little caption marked “Tag,” but that’s not what they’ve done. Instead you need to know what to tap or pull up to get to the place where it says “add caption.” Not “tag” but “add caption.” Hey, does your marketing department (the features and benefits folks) talk to the engineers putting in the features that benefit folks? No? That was Steve Jobs job (Jobs job – get it?) and he’s dead. So no. Okay.
So I tapped something or swiped something and my photo disappeared and I landed back at square one. But this time the search was cut in half timewise because I remembered photos I had skimmed past. (“No, after that … and that…”)
Found it. Looked at at photo first. (“Oh the plastic piece conected to the hinge goes around the little white wheel and then to the spring whose other end attaches to the edge of the dishwasher.”) The conceptual problem I was having was that, apparently, when the rope broke the piece attached to the right angle extension had flipped 180 degrees. When I looked to attach the new rope piece I couldn’t figure out how in the position of the old piece it could work. Well, it couldn’t. Duh. This only became clear after looking at the photo. (“Hey. LG, Terrific idea. Put a line drawing on the bag with the part, or in a little piece of paper that you put in the bag. It would take ten seconds for an engineer to draw it and what three years to get it into the packaging, but it would be so worth it.”)
After noting the date of the photo I attempted to tag it. Oh yeah, swipe up the details where you get the map of where the photo was taken and in light gray small letters at the top of the pull up display it says, “Caption.” Why didn’t I think to look there to “tag” a photo. But I get it. This is part of a long tradition of folks telling you how easy something is to do, demonstarting it with hot young models in bikinis or tight fitting banana carrier swim suits, and not actually showing you how to do it, but just the effect once you do it. And don’t forget to switch the title of the benefit to something else when you get into it so people are confused (“Is adding a caption tagging?”)
Okay. Photo tagged, spring on. “put the dishwasher back together and slide into place.” Estimated time – half a day. Why? The wires and the water pipe have to be slide under the machine as you put it back into place. This can be a huge P.in.The.A (or “PINTA” Now, we know where Columbus put all the whiners on his cruise.)
The trick here is to have the right technology, which in this case is masking tape and 4 foot long marshmellow skewers. Pass the skewers from the front of the machine where you want the water hose and the electric wires to go. There’s a conceptual mistake that often is made: that you can “pull” the wires and the hose through. This would be true if the wires and hose were ong enough, but they are not. You have to push the dishwasher over and let the hose and wires come through the machine. This is equivalent to trying to have intercourse with a limp (no, not gonna say it. Wouldn’t be prudent.)
Once the skewers are through the machine along the paths for the hose and the wires tape the skewers to their respective components. In the cae of the hose you can stick the pointy end into the hose end – and tape it. For the wires wrap masking tape for 3 or 4 inches allong the skewer making sure to wrap the little ends of wire so they don’t get caught as they pass through.
Now, here comes the genius trick. (Mark this part of the essay with a lit match!) …
Tape the skewers to the floor! If you don’t the wires, hose, and skewers will move around, (Refer to Limp Dick note above*.)
* Darnit, I said it. “Wet Spaghetti” Yeah that’s it. “Through a key hole.”
Now put the disnwasher in place, pul hose enough to be able to attach it. Because the hose has to make a right angle bend to attach it throws off the threading and causes binding whcih makes the nut really hard to turn, unless you hold the hose straight on. Gee, I wish I had thought of doing that when I was dataching that nut.
Attach wires. “Do you remember how they go?” No. Look at photos you took to make sure. Okay. Done. Now realize you forgot to put wires through little hole to box where wires reside. Debate leaving as is. Detach. Stick it through (No limp noodle here!) reattach wires. Try to push back into box and put on cover. Cover won’t go on withoutlots of cursing and fiddling and … there it is! Done.
Now attach the other end of the water hose. Just pull the hose back through the hole in the wood. Hose won’t budge. Is it caught on the back of the dishwasher. Will I have to pull the dishwasher back out? Try new strategy “Curse and Pull.” It worked. I can almost get it to reach the water cutoff valve. Short six inches. (No. Don’t say it. Don’t think it.) More curse and pull – for six inches. Should sound familiar. “Come on Baby!”
Something let go and the hose is released. Fits onto spigot. No problem, other than earlier mentioned shoulders wood slat.
Done. Turn back on breaker. Push buttons on dishwasher for test. It works. No splarks. No wet spots (No. I told you, “don’t think it.”)
Done. Except for all those bottles and cans to go bck under the sink. And the tools put back.
Time! – All day, with breaks for lunch, Hopkins lacrosse, and a show on JWST on NOVA, which was incredible.
I meant to write about something else.
Oh well. (Old Age and Debonair. That was it. Damn.)